Spring (Training) Has Sprung
The Phils kicked off Spring Training 2011 today with a news conference to show off their much-ballyhooed-before-they’ve-even-thrown-a-pitch-together rotation. I’m not sure what the whole point was, really, as no new ground was covered. The questions were predictable, as were the responses.
All five starters were present.
Yes, five. Of course, the way the media have been hyping the “Four Aces”, one could be forgiven for forgetting that there is, in fact, a fifth starter. You know, the Other Guy, Joe Blanton.
At one point, one of the media members led off a question to Cole Hamels by stating that he was the “only one with a ring”. Uh, hellooo? Joe Blanton was on the ’08 staff too. Said reporter quickly corrected himself. I guess he’s been listening to all that hype a bit too much.
The pitchers themselves seem to be trying to downplay the whole “Four Aces” thing. When asked which of the nicknames for the rotation they liked best, Cliff Lee asked what they were. Someone out of range of the microphone rattled off a few. Kudos to Cliff for pointing out that all he heard in those nicknames were references to four guys, but there were five guys up on the podium.
Even after the conference had ended, Comcast’s Michael Barkann referred to the “Mount Rushmore” of rotations in his wrap-up.
Yo, Michael! Mount Rushmore only has four heads!
Hmm, not a bad image. But look! There’s a bit of space there to squeeze in a fifth head.
OK, so it’s a wee bit smaller than the others. Let’s just hope that the starting five can live up to the “monumental” expectations already being thrown their way.
Ladies, Who’s Ready For Another Six-pack??
♫ I like big butts and I cannot lie… ♫
Big butts, little butts, and all the butts in between (but not the really flat, Tim Lincecum-type butts).
Since one six-pack is never enough, here’s another to tease your brain and delight your eyeballs. Try to stop drooling long enough to leave your best guesses in the comments. 
Panama butt
Evergreen state butt
butt of the past
butt of the phuture
a really nice butt whose owner doesn’t seem to have any nicknames that I can find
an obvious butt
The first person to identify all six butts correctly gets, well, nothing, except the satisfaction of knowing that you really know your butts!
(all photos by me)
Well, THAT Took Me By Surprise!
Call it a Christmas miracle.
As I was reading a column in today’s paper that the Phillies were ”showing interest” in signing Cliff Lee, hubby came in the door and said that the Phils had actually signed him. “Yeah, right”, I thought. So I checked the news on my handy cell phone (what did we ever do without them?), and saw that it was so. And for fewer years and less money than either the Yankees or Rangers were offering! With Halladay, Oswalt, Hamels, and now Lee, the Phillies’ starting rotation will be a force to be reckoned with next season.
It was only last year around this time that I was lamenting Cliff’s departure to Seattle via trade, and wishing there was a way to clone him.
Well, I don’t need to wish any more! Happy Ho-Lee-days, everyone!
Grab A Six-pack Of Heineys!
Hmm, maybe later.
Actually, I had a different kind of heiney in mind. 
[men, you may want to stop reading now]
Ladies, just how well do you know your Phillies? See if you can identify this six-pack of heineys (with some tiny hints thrown in)!
a Perfect butt
prognosticating butt
Tinseltown butt
a Big Piece of butt
butt of Gold
The Man, The Butt
So, how many can you identify? And which is your favorite? Enjoy! I’ll be working on another six-pack in a few days or so.
(all photos by me – hey, I have a really big lens!)
Cast Your Vote Again!
Been pretty busy this week with work and dog adoption. Yes, we’ve adopted a dog. The kids have been wanting one for awhile, but we’d always managed to put it off. This fall, as motivation for field hockey, we told our daughter that if she scored a goal, we would get a dog. We figured we were pretty safe, as she hadn’t scored any goals at all in three prior seasons. Never even come close.
But then she scored one in the last game of the season.
I wasn’t planning on counting an “unofficial” one from a game or two earlier, but this was an honest-to-goodness goal. So we have a new addition – a 2 1/2 year old female springer spaniel mix named Maggie. So far, so good…
[I'll have to try to get a good photo of her to post]
As for voting again, Jane Heller has nominated her She-Fan Cam video of me from Spring Training for one of her She-Fan Video Awards! No actual prize, just the thrill of victory to the winner. So please stop by her blog, and leave a comment to cast your vote for me.
Thanks!
Cast Your Vote!
This image best represents which of the following options?
a) The way I felt after eating too much leftover Halloween candy. [must remember to buy stuff I don't like]
b) My reaction when the team of castoffs, oops, femininely-named, uh, thong-wearing, no, girlie-haired, I mean, San Francisco Giants won the World Series. [let's hope the "rally thong" is NOT among the items that will be heading to the HOF's World Series display]
c) Many Phillies phans’ reaction to the news that Davey Lopes will not be returning next season, due to the fact that he and the team could not agree on terms of his salary. [bad move by the Phillies! Davey's impact on the success of the running game was HUGE!]
d) What happened when I accidentally caught a whiff of my son’s socks. [it was BAD! like something had died in there]
e) All of the above!
At Least They’re Not Prima Donnas
Game 1 of the World Series is tonight, but even though my foul mood cloud has finally dissipated, I’m not watching it. Frankly, I don’t really care who wins, though if pressed to choose, I would probably prefer the Rangers.
Instead, I’ve been searching the internet for entertaining tidbits to share with you. Did you know that the comments section of MLB.com articles can be a treasure trove of amusement?
I found this particular comment in response to a column of Phillies news regarding, among other things, Utley’s subpar season and Rollins’ declining numbers. I’ll have to assume that the author is probably a Phillies fan, though they seem not to think much of the majority of the team, and apparently don’t believe in capitalization.:
According to 420philly, the Phillies are a “bunch of pre madonnas”.
Aha! No wonder we got beat in the NLCS – we need to let this team of “pre madonnas” mature into full-fledged Madonnas.
But which Madonna?
Are we talking about the Material Girl?
Or the Spiritual Girl?
And which one would be the better ballplayer?
(title unprintable)
[words cannot begin to convey the author's current level of foulness - plug your ears and stay out of her path until further notice]
We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Programming To Bring You This Important Announcement
A system of severe foul humor that has stalled in the southeastern region of Pennsylvania is currently intensifying. Due to the increasing threat of frequent outbursts of vitriol, this blog entry is postponed until further notice.
***UPDATED FORECAST: The latest data show the system weakening slightly, and moving away from the Philadelphia region. However, there is a chance the system may re-intensify over the weekend. Be on the alert!***
[I couldn't find a web image that conveyed the look I had in mind, so I had to draw my own. Admittedly, this borrows heavily from Jim Benton's Franny K. Stein character.]
Bad Mood Alert!
Watch out world, I’m not too happy at the moment.
This, of course, is the result of the Phillies lackluster effort against the Giants yesterday. Once again, their bats failed to come to life, as they were shut out 3-0.
What is going on?
One possible explanation: they were lulled to sleep by the most totally un-stirring, un-inspiring, un-energetic performance of the National Anthem that I have ever heard.
I often wonder who chooses the anthem performers for the playoff games. You would think they might try to find someone with ties to the city where the game is being played. San Francisco has a rich musical history – Santana, Journey, Steve Miller, Train, I’d even take Huey Lewis.
But we get someone named Ben Gibbard, of the band Death Cab for Cutie. They are from Seattle, and Gibbard is a self-proclaimed Mariners fan. They couldn’t at least find a Giants fan?
[tangential thought: I know there are some wacky band names out there, but this one stumps me. Who is Cutie? And why is she taking a "death cab"? Is it like the Cash Cab, but if you answer wrong you die?]
So maybe this was all part of the Giants strategy, because the result was this:
No offense!!!!!
My mood was not helped when rodeo clown wannabe, um, evil elf Cody Ross knocked in the first run of the game for the Giants. Replays showed the pitch was not down and on the inside half of the plate, like the three homers he’s hit so far off Phillies pitchers, but low and away. So how does he manage to pull that pitch and line it into left field?
There’s only one logical answer: someone has been dealing with the devil.
[OK, probably not, but it was fun to deface his picture. I feel a little better now.]
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